Saturday, April 2, 2011

Wanderlust



I grew up in a suburban town. We had hills and trees and the like, and while those always interested me as a child, what truly fascinated me were the mountains. Always looming somewhere off in the distance, rolling behind the skyline in muted blues and grays, and ever beyond my reach were the mountains. 

I wanted to go to them. Every time my mother drove us over the bridge over the highway to get to the supermarket, I wanted us to keep driving and head for the mountains. they called to me for some reason, even as a child. 

Sometimes I'd get closer to them. When we went to visit my aunt, we'd drive out in that direction and reach the foot of some mountains, though usually small ones, and cliffs that fascinated me with their miniature waterfalls. But whenever we reached a break in the hilly terrain, what did I see rolling off in the distance? 

Of course. More mountains. And then I wanted to follow the road until I reached those mountains. I suppose this interests me now simple because the more I think about it, the more I realize that I've been carrying this insatiable wanderlust with me my whole life, even when I was young, before anything had happened to me, and before I was running away from things. There was something pure about it then. I didn't want to go to escape any pain or sadness, or because I was afraid. I wanted to go because, well, there were mountains, and it was beautiful how they seemed to melt into the sky. It was almost as if they weren't real. I wanted to see them up close and climb them, and look down from the top and see what I could see in the distance.

I stood atop mountains a few times in my life. I used to ski a lot, and that brings you to an awful lot of mountains. The trouble with that, of course, is that every peak has its own amazing view - of more mountains in the distance waiting to be climbed and explored. 

Someday, I'll go and chase after my mountains. I can't say when, and I can't explain why, I just know that someday, I'll get in a car and drive towards the blue-gray mountains until they come into focus and I can climb to the top and scout out a new blurry peak to conquer somewhere out in the distance. 

~Jessica

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